I don’t think I have any idea what the definition ever was for having a pure heart.
An untainted piece of gold in the middle of the beauty that surrounds and solidifies it in its cocoon of safety. A heart where every beat is simply designed to dance with the happiness of the person it inhibits until its work is done.
Where did I miss the joy of being innocent and untouched by circumstances surrounding my inner core? Did I fail in making it affect me in the wrong ways and taking it to my core when I should have shunned the ugly? Will you ever get it back or didn’t you have it to start with?
When you view my web browser history you might be shocked to what extent I have searched to find the answers I’m looking for. Search engine to search engine asking extensively to find out where all my anger and hatred originated from. When I couldn’t find out where it all started I turned against myself and blamed myself for the ways the world saw me and the way I wanted them to see me. Blaming myself for my short comings and for who I was and brainwashing myself too think I could change this.